What's in a dream?

Last night, I dreamt that I was pregnant.

That's a new one!

(Maybe it's because Liz said she would let me be her surrogate, ha.)

The Ministry of Reconciliation

I will not go into details, but I feel compelled to share with you that God has dropped me into the middle of a situation where I can do nothing but be a minister of reconciliation and it is absolutely amazing. I feel as though I am suddenly living for the first time, that an unopened corner of life has suddenly been opened to me, that a part of living I had heard of for so long that I had sought, prayed for, and desired is now being realized. And this is not to say that from here on out I will continue to live in this part of God's Kingdom, but let me just say that it is a beautiful and enlivening part of His house and I am fantastically grateful for the privilege of being used by God in this way. I am so undeserving but then He delights in using the undeserving, so it should be no surprise.

"All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation: that God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting men's sins against them. And he has committed to us the message of reconciliation. We are therefore Christ's ambassadors, as though God were making his appeal through us. We implore you on Christ's behalf: Be reconciled to God. God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God." II Corinthians 5:18-21


It is difficult sometimes living as a citizen of God's kingdom when the reality of His kingdom is so hidden by the distractions of our world, the comforts and security of our society. And so it is refreshing to be in a situation where all of that is stripped away and I can see in someone else's life that God's kingdom is a reality and our only hope in a fallen and untrustworthy world.

I also wanted to comment on "Facing the Giants" since I saw it tonight, but I think that will have to wait. I would encourage you to go see it while it's in theaters right now though; it's not often you get to hear people praising God in the face of harship on the big screen.

Virtual Relationships

So I read this article in The Atlantic about the future of video games. The article focused on two innovative and visionary minds, Mateas and Stern, whose dream is to make virtual characters so real that players "feel like you're immersed in an actual relationship."

As I read, I cringed a bit and could feel many of my friends cringe with the thought: "It is a sad state of affairs when we must turn to computers to fill the relational void that pervades our lives and our society." I do wonder why it is that interacting with an artificial intelligence has such a draw and intrigue when we so readily give up on interacting with the real intelligences around us.

On the other hand, the clinical psychologist in me immediately thought of the therapeutic use of such technology. Instead of waiting for particular interactions and dynamics to come up in therapy sessions, these could be simulated in a virtual role play. Social skills, communication, conflict resolution, forgiveness... these could all be practiced in a controlled environment, confidence and competence gained with which to send an individual out to use these experiences in real life with friends and family. Furthermore, it need not be limited to clinical environments. If children and adults were "playing" out these interactions in their spare time, would it not readily transfer to real living and lead to better relationship skills? "Jen, you can't be serious," you might be thinking. And my reply is that I am leaving out numerous caveats, cautions, and limitations that come immediately to mind as I write this... But let me just ask, would this type of entertainment not be a step above the mindless shoot-em-up, action games that pervade the market today? I am willing to be wrong on this point. Because it would not be better if people then ended up spending more time with fake people than real people...

Wow, this is such a loaded entry that I'm surprised I'm posting it. But it is a fascinating and engaging idea and very possibly a phenomenon that we will face one day.

There is obviously more that could be said, but I have other things that require my time. But if you're interested in a taste of what Mateas and Stern are seeking to create, a prototype is available for free download at www.interactivestory.net. There you will find a program called "Facade" that is basically a 20 minute one-act interactive drama in which you visit two friends who are in the middle of a marital crisis. Your presence and input affects (and actually effects, I suppose) the outcome of said crisis. Sadly, my computer does not have a high enough processing speed to keep up with the program so I have not made it past an initial introduction through Grace and Trip's front door before they stand before me speechless and blinking.

If you do try it out, please let me know what you think!

Autumn Leaves

Enjoyed a pleasant escape this afternoon. I was only a few blocks from home and a few blocks from work... but it seriously felt like another world. I sat on a bench in the Lombardy children's park under a golden tree, blue sky above, and sunlight breaking through the leaves; small, adorable children wandering around and peering up at the solitary girl with curious eyes as their parents kept careful watch from a distance. So quiet, so peaceful, so carefree and pleasant. It was a delight watching as various mothers, grandmother's, and fathers brought their children to and from the park. What a delight having children must be. As a girl, I never felt the strong desire for motherhood that some experience, but I suddenly, within the past few months, have found my hope growing that I would know this unique joy someday. It truly fills me with wonder.